screw small talk + due diligence in data
ONE BOWL OF REALLY GOOD RAMEN LATER, SOMA —
recently, i’m either networking or meeting a friend of a friend of a friend, friends with at least one of my friends from michigan. this concentrated period of meeting so many new faces forced me to embed a small mantra for sanity: screw the small talk. let’s skip talking about your latest product launch and talk about why you would ever try to run a company, and take in all the risks that come with it? we could talk about your 9-5 during this housewarming party, or we could talk about what you would do if you weren’t a software engineer at square.
in no way am i a pioneer (being nosey is not a novel concept) but diving deep at a high concentration has given me a few little lessons. more on all this later, but first my words + reads.
my words: i wrote about oyo, a travel startup in india that has been backed by softbank and airbnb. it’s raising so much money, that it accounts for 92 percent of the past year’s venture funding scored by india hospitality startups.
etc: this article was purely inspired by the fact that ever since covering oyo back in march, i’ve had an eye toward india hospitality startups. finally, i noticed a small bangalore travel startup raised some money and it was a rabbit hole from there. that’s how 95% of my stories are created: a hunch, followed by observations, followed by some wiggle room to make it into a timely story.
learning lesson: at first, a whole lot of funding data around hospitality in india made me think the story would be about how these startups are getting some momentum in the region. gaps are being addressed! one deeper look later, and that’s not true. it ended up just being one player in the market getting all the funding. it reminded me data is nuanced, and due diligence amid deadlines is important.
unorganized tab time:
a follow up on #MeToo in tech
a reminder we all need (sometimes some more than others)
the scary inner workings of a facebook content moderation site
esports, marshmello and fortnite — all in a tech story
elon says these companies are doomed
a qz column that keeps popping up during networking events. agree? disagree?
one-liner:
“don’t be afraid to take the risks…it starts a conversation.” mary biggins, ceo/founder of mealpal, on her time building out her previous company, classpass. some context, classpass once did a promo where they offered $100 giftcards to lululemon for new customers. this was hard to actually do. classpass employees ended up mass buying these giftcards by going to lulu stores. it was a nightmare, but it started a conversation, biggins said during a menlo ventures event.
anyways, back to before:
skipping the small talk has taught me a few things.
get a thick skin. this will backfire. not everyone cares to know me past formalities (the feelings are mutual), so learn how to take someone rolling their eyes at your whole shtick.*
the success is worth the awkwardness (and you succeed more than you think!). i once stayed up until 4 a.m. with some new friends talking about how our parents got to this country. i spent a dinner talking about my worse qualities. an uber driver has given me a source for a story. i’m also in a book club with someone i met once.
you can’t just be good at asking the questions. you have to be good at answering some, too! if you stutter at chatting about your own hobbies, or your thoughts on religion, i’m guessing there’s stuff to unpack there within yourself. skipping small talk with others includes yourself. and being new in a city, i enjoy having a reason to root down my values.
bottom line: i like talking to people who don’t crinkle their faces at the thought of talking about something beyond their jobs and how much their commute sucks. it’s refreshing and perfectly selfish. also, it’s easier to remember the name of the jamie that tells you about their side hustle doing calligraphy, versus the jamie bitching about the size of their apartment. again.
try skipping small talk with one person this week. let me know how it goes.
to being nosey,
N
*this is hard. i mostly crumble into fetal position if someone doesn’t want to unpack with me. will work on thicker skin eventually. maybe. probably not. but good luck to you!