reflecting on 24

can you reflect on your mid 20s while you're still in them?

BELLOTA, SF —

i turned 25 yesterday. and, as habit has it, that means it’s time to reflect on 24. what else are your mid 20s for, if not reflecting on formative moments a bit too soon with a bit too much earnestness?

i spent the better half of 24 at home in NJ, mostly running into memories of younger versions of myself. my jogs were on same the streets that i trick-or-treated through, and my weekends were on the same couch that i watched high school musical’s debut. i slept in the same room that i painted an angsty, middle school red and i ate the same indian dishes built on the garlic, tomato, ginger base that i never appreciated until i moved to college. my home friends no longer needed a descriptor to differentiate, they were simply my friends again.

returning to a place like home, with a little more context on what i left it for, was as transformative as it was exhausting. on bad days, stagnancy felt like the defining theme of my 20s. on good days, the theme felt like independence.

if 22 was about graduating college and moving to a new city, then 23 was about falling in love and finding a community of friends to turn into family, one priya krishna recipe at a time. naturally, then, 24 was about stepping back into myself to play catch up. the pandemic made the reflection a non-negotiable.

when you return to a place that knew you when you were younger, you’re given a visual reminder of how much you’ve grown. jogs became reflections, and weekends became meditations. my walls were reminders, and my mom’s food felt like a way to reverse engineer the secrets to building my future happy home. my friends, and our decades-long friendships, were exhibits of timeless love.

experiencing this past year in this way gave me so many gifts. i unlearned a lot of things that should have never been normalized, relearned what it means to have alone time for me and not for social media, and changed my mind on everything from my love language to how to structure health goals. i introduced a version of myself that was much better than my high school self to my parents and bro. i told myself that it’s okay to trust fall into the communities that i spent my early 20s building up, because even if some don’t show up, the important ones always will - especially the amazing guy i have the privilege of dating.

my experience with 24 is probably not too different than how you experienced whatever age you turned during the pandemic. a forced slow down has a way of making you sit with who you are, were, and want to be.

to moving around more with balance and perspective in 25,

n

p.s. if you’ve read this far, thank you! my goal for this year is to finally start writing a fiction book about love, relationships, the indian american experience, etc. if you or anyone you know has advice, please share!