present day + a drop out robot
i'm an over-thinker by design, but that looks a lot different now than it did 3 months ago
YOU, BROKE MY HEART —
as an over-thinker, i traditionally find being present a hard thing to do. but, these days, that feels like literally all that any of us can do.
it is weird to live in a time where our memories feel impossible (trips to see friends, celebrations, that one amazing dinner) and our future feels even more unknown than before. with no tensions pulling us back and forward, we’re left with actually taking life one day at a time.
on one hand, it means it only took a pandemic for me to make time to call my family twice a day (maybe even 5 times if its a sunday). on the other, more serious note, i can’t plan the next time i’ll see my family and friends in new jersey.
that exact contrast is why quarantine has felt like sadness mixed with moments of happiness and random bursts of guilt. now add being *always present* into the mix, and it means we’re all here and aware to feel these ups and downs as they come — more than ever before. rooting yourself firmly in the present is both relieving, and an adjustment.
more later, including three tips that you can start using today, but first my my words + reads:
my words: as lockdowns stretch on, schools have to answer increasingly complicated questions, from how to track active, not passive, attendance to how to reduce drop out rates. read my story on how edtech is showing up to help.
etc: i’m starting to see companies which, to be frank, seem like they wouldn’t resonate with a college audience start to work. for most, the notion of sharing personal woes with a college-owned robot may be uncomfortable to some students. i pulled out some anecdotes that prove otherwise.
learning lesson: it is easy to get swept up in large percentages and “total #” pieces when writing about layoffs. it’s why parsing through the data for time to time to tell the other story, the human one, matters so much. i wrote about how data tells us which roles appear more vulrenable than others.
unorganized tab time:
anyways,
here are three tips i’ve have from our new day by day world:
we need to actively make space for reflection. i’m used to passively thinking on my walks to work or strolls through grocery store aisles, often losing myself within the neighborhood trader joes when catching up with old friends. that’s no longer a reality. many of us work, sleep, laugh, live, and garish our food with our new microplanes all in the same square apartment. it means we don’t have any visual cues or cheesy coffee shop look-outside-the-window moments to think to ourselves, so we need to do what we can to allocate time just to exist with our thoughts.
for me, this looks like running more and taking the first 10 minutes of my day without my phone. i realize that i am incredibly lucky (and back to feeling guilty, incredibly privileged). find your version of space.
we’re all busy. still show up for friends. it is normal to feel like the busiest, stressed person in the world these days. but it is important to take time to show up for friends the way you would’ve been if there was a reunion on the books. on a weirdly leveling note, all friends are now long distance, regardless of the coast they might live on. it means that energy can be clearly illustrated in facetime history, not your ability to grab a nonchalant drink after friday work. little by little, this recalibration of sorts is helping me connect with friends more consistently than i have in months.
stay confused. being present means that the past feels both insignificant and substantial at the same damn time. it is both all we have, and all we don’t at the same time. don’t feel guilty for having a week of being above this confusion, and don’t feel down on yourself when this all overwhelms you beyond getting up in the morning. this is not a game of sadness.
i hope in some way these tips make you feel seen or heard. comment your realizations below, because putting words to this madness continues to be a crazy challenge.
to today,
n